Hello, my dears.
I am Beatrix but everybody calls
me Bee (like the insect). I have been living in the US for the last 5 years,
but I still managed to keep in touch with friends from back home. Ana and I
have known each other for ages. We met in 5th grade, when I
transferred to the school where she was attending. Although we haven’t kept in
touch after 8th grade, we found each other like 2 years ago on the
internet. So there you go, we reconnected thanks to the internet. I can honestly say we haven’t changed that
much, just matured a little bit and got wiser.
Salutari, dragele mele.
Ma numesc Beatrix, dar
lumea imi spune Bee (ca pe insecta). Locuiesc in SUA de 5 ani, dar am reusit sa
pastrez legatura cu prietenii de acasa. Eu si Ana ne stim de secole. Ne-am
intalnit in clasa a cincea cand eu m-am transferat la scoala ei si, chiar daca
nu am pastrat legatura dupa clasa a opta, ne-am regasit pe internet aproximativ
acum 2 ani. Sincer, nu ne-am schimbat asa de mult, doar ne-am maturizat un pic
si am devenit mai intelepte.
It took me a while to realize that I could never
find myself in the pages of women magazines. In the past I wasn’t mature enough
to see with a critical eye the information I was offered, I was very easily
influenced by the ‘advice’ offered by this type of magazines. All they do is
lower your self-esteem, so you would think they’re good for you and they help
you, so you keep buying them. Why do I say this? Because after 10 minutes of
reading let’s say X Magazine, I already felt unsecure, frustrated and unhappy:
I am not skinny enough, my skin is not perfect, I don’t have the latest
clothes, I don’t have the perfect relationship or something is wrong with me
cause I’m not in a relationship etc. You get the point. Having said this, I
would like through this weekly column to share with you advice, encouragements,
to be like a support group for us girls.
Niciodata
nu m-am regasit in revistele pentru femei, insa mi-a luat ceva timp pentru a
accepta realitatea. In trecut nu aveam maturitatea necesara de a discerne
si de a privi informatia oferita cu un ochi critic, eram usor influentata de
‘sfaturile’ oferite in paginile acestor reviste. Tot ce fac ele este sa-ti
scada nivelul stimei de sine pentru a te convinge ca sunt si ca te ajuta, doar
pentru a le cumpara continuu. De ce zic asta? Pentru ca, dupa 10 minute de
rasfoit revista X, imi era de ajuns sa ma simt complexata si frustrata,
nefericita: nu sunt suficient de slaba, tenul meu nu este perfect, nu am
hainele cele mai trendy, nu am relatia perfecta sau e ceva in neregula cu mine
pentru ca nu am o relatie etc. Intelegeti voi. Pornind de la aceasta premisa,
doresc ca prin aceasta rubrica saptamanala sa dau sfaturi, incurajari, sa fie, cum
ar zice americanu’, un fel de support group pt noi, dom’soarele si doamnele.
I would like to make it clear from the beginning what this column is NOT: I
will not talk about Cosmo like subjects “40 methods to reach ecstasy”, “10
tricks to get him back”, “7backstabing techniques to steal her boyfriend”, “X
positions to make you the perfect girlfriend in bed”, “what to do when your man
feels threatened by your intelligence-easy: be slutty in bed”. I had enough of
this kind of frivolous articles that have no real value for us, girls.
Vreau sa spun clar, de la inceput, ce nu se vrea
aceasta rubrica a fi: nu voi dezbate
aici subiecte gen Cosmo - “40 de metode pentru a atinge super extazul”, ‘10
trucuri ca sa il recuceresti”, “7 smecherii ca sa ii furi prietenul”, “ X
pozitii pentru a fi iubita perfecta in pat”, “ce faci cand barbatu’ se simte
amenintat de inteligenta ta – simplu: fii slutty in pat” etc. Pur si simplu
sunt satula de astfel de articole frivole si insipide care nu au nici un fel de
valoare pentru noi, fetele.
Now let’s get back to our business. Today I would like to talk about how
important is to have faith and to believe in our own inner strength. We all go
through hard times when we are depressed, we doubt ourselves, we harshly
criticize ourselves and we believe there is no escape for the situation we are
in. The best advice I ever got was from a very close friend. She said to me
“You are not special!”. You would be outraged to hear such a thing, but before
you do that, I’ll tell you what she meant. We have a narcissistic tendency to
believe that our problems are more important, are special, and are unique
compared to the other people’s problems. But is not like that. Even though we
don’t go through similar situations and we don’t have identical lives, that
doesn’t mean our problems are more important. We all are affected by what is
happening around us and suffer the same way.
Iar acum sa trecem la oile noastre. Azi doresc
sa discut despre cat de important este avem incredere in propriile noastre forte.
Fiecare dintre noi trece prin momente in care suntem deprimate, ne indoim de
noi insine, ne criticam aspru si nu credem ca exista o solutie pentru situatia
in care ne aflam. Cel mai bun sfat pe care l-am primit de la o prietena de
suflet a fost: “tu nu esti speciala!”. Probabil v-ati revolta daca o prietena
v-ar spune asta, dar inainte sa o faceti sa va explic la ce se referea ea. La
faptul ca avem tendinta narcisista de a crede ca problemele noastre sunt mai
importante, mai speciale, sunt unice in comparatie cu problemele altora. Dar nu
e asa. Chiar daca nu trecem prin situatii similare si nu avem vieti cotidiene
identice, asta nu inseamna ca problemele mele sunt mai imporante decat ale celorlalti.
Toti suferim si suntem afectati de ce se intampla in jurul nostru.
But, what makes us special is the way in which we manage to get over these
obstacles. There are 2 options: we keep our head high like winners and pass
them, or we abandon the fight, we quit and continue to feel depressed, feel
sorry for ourselves and act like victims.
Insa, ceea ce ne face speciali e modul in care
reusim sa trecem peste aceste obstacole. Fie trecem peste ele cu fruntea sus,
ca invingatori sau abandonam, ne dam batuti si persistam in starea sufleteasca
de deprimare, mizerie si victimizare.
Is not productive to feel sorry for
ourselves. Get over it! You cry an hour, a day, pour your frustrations
out, but do not persist in this state of mind. Believe me, I know the feeling
and is not worth it. It’s just a waste of time, a waste of tears and stress can
affect us in a very bad way our health. If you want things to change in your
life be proactive and start with yourself first, no matter what you are dealing
with.
A ne plange de mila nu este productiv. Get over
it!!! Plangi o ora, o zi, varsa-ti naduful, frustrarile, dar nu persista cu
aceasta stare. Stiu cum este si credeti-ma, nu se merita. Este o pierdere de
timp, de lacrimi, iar stresul ne afecteaza negativ sanatatea. Daca vrei ca
lucrurile sa se schimbe in viata ta, schimbarea trebuie sa inceapa cu tine.
Indiferent cu ce te confrunti.
And another very important thing is to be
surrounded by real friends. It means the world if you have 2 or 3 real friends.
Quality, not quantity matters. And this life principle can be applied to
anything.
Iar inca un lucru pe care il consider important
este de a avea langa tine prieteni adevarati. Daca ai acolo doi sau trei prieteni
de suflet, asta conteaza enorm. Calitatea, nu cantitatea conteza. Iar acest
principiu poate fi aplicat in orice situatie.
Ana and I would like to always be there for you
and help you with and advice, a kind word or with an encouragement. Please, if
you need any advice or have any questions or concerns, send them to us. We are
here for you, to listen, support or, if we can, help you. You can contact us at ana.s_beautyblog@yahoo.com
and don’t be shy, talk to us, we are here for you.
Eu si Ana suntem oricand la dispozitia voastra, pentru a va ajuta cu tot ce doriti. Puteti sa ne adresati sfaturi, intrebari, sau puteti pur si simplu sa ne impartasiti framantarile voastre. Suntem aici pentru voi, sa va ascultam, sa va sprijinim si, daca putem, sa va ajutam. Ne puteti contacta la adresa
de mail ana.s_beautyblog@yahoo.com
si nu va sfiiti sa vorbiti cu noi, suntem aici pentru voi.
XoXo,
Bee
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